The Service celebrating the life of Brian Kinder will be held in the John Allsion/Monkhouse Chapel, cnr. Strachans Road and Nepean Highway Mornington on Wednesday April 5 commencing at 10 am.

In lieu of flowers, donations to Motor Neurone Association of Australia would be appreciated. Envelopes will be available at the chapel.

Peacefully on April 1 aged 68 years.
Loving Father and Father in Law of Leonie and Narelle and Paul.
Adored Poppy of Callum, Jade and Edward. Dearest brother of Pam and Maureen. Brother in Law of Kevin.

Never Forgotten

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Brian Steel Kinder Obituary by daughter Narelle Walton Nee Kinder
5 April 2006

This bottle of Grange has a story behind it. My husband Paul and I on our wedding day left a bottle of Grange in its wooden box at his dad's seating place and my dad's seating place at the reception. Well my father in-law took one look at it, opened it straight away and shared it around, dad on the other hand opened the lid of the box saw what it was put the lid straight back on and hid it under his chair. Dad said he wanted to save it for a special occasion like when our first child was born, well he didn't have to wait that long so dad came to Sydney the grange came to Sydney, dad mentioned opening the Grange, then dad left and the full bottle of Grange left with him. Both came back up for another visit when our daughter was born dad mentioned opening the Grange but again a full unopened bottle went back with him. Many of you who knew dad and his love for a good bottle of red well really any bottle good or bad may be a little surprised to why he didn't open it. We all know dad didn't need any special occasion to open a bottle just the good company.

Dad was such a beautiful giving man he never put himself first, he didn't want to open it he wanted to give it back to us unopened years later in case it was worth something. We finally made dad crack it open at Xmas 2004 we had the most wonderful holiday with dad it was just before he had to give up drinking. The look on his face when he took the first sip will be something that I will never forget dad was in pure heaven. That would have to be the only bottle of red that dad has taken his time to empty.

Most of you would have shared with dad one of his famous Sunday BBQ's, a few beers and glasses of wine this is what dad did best. He loved nothing more than sitting around a BBQ with friends and family, this is all dad needed to make him happy. He loved being around people and they loved being around him. Mount Martha is where dad called home his place at Maureen and Kevin's is where he loved the most.

I would have to describe my dad as a great man, a true gentleman, a terrific father and father in-law, a loyal husband, brother, brother in-law, uncle and friend and of course a fantastic poppy. Dad you will be remembered by your laugh, your smile, sense of humor, loyalty, generosity, beautiful nature and the effect you had on all those around you.

Dad your life has been cut short, my wish would be to have you always at the end of the phone, to see you on holidays, at birthdays, Christmas, first days of school, grandparents day, driving lessons, 18's, 21st's, weddings. These are the things you are supposed to be here for and I am not sure how to get through them without you. I understand you are finally at peace and that does give me some comfort. Dad I miss you so much, you have left a big hole in my life and that part of me will always be empty. I am so lucky to have had you as my father and I am so very proud of you.

Every cask that is opened, every screw top unscrewed, every cork that is popped will be done in your honor.

I love you always and forever.

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From Brian's niece, Karen Fitzgerald, April 5th 2006

Whenever I spent time with Brian, there was always a moment or two when there would be a competition of wits. The banter could be about anything, always full of bull, done in good humour with lots of laughs. And then Brian would always be the one to back down first, finishing with one of his winning smiles and a hug. Boy, am I going to miss that.

To me, Brian was a man who represented strength, determination, humility and kindness. He always had a wealth of courage in the face of adversity, with Motor Neurone Disease being one of his greatest tests. During his independent years, Brian was not a man who demanded or expected anything of me, but was just grateful to spend time with his family. The demanding aspect of him only changed when he became ill, but so much of that was because dignity was important to Brian, and mate, I'm proud to say you were dignified to the end.

I don't want to spend too much time talking about how Motor Neurone Disease affected Brian and his family, except to say that it's a cruel and devastating disease that constantly challenged Brian's spirit. He had no respite from it and his sense of control was increasingly robbed from him. Well Brian, eternal relief has come to you and now you can rest in peace.

The cornflower symbolises Motor Neurone Disease week, which is this week. And this flower has extra special meaning to our family as it was Gran's (Brian's mother) favourite flower.

I'm sure Brian would like me to say a few words about our family. Through Brian's plight, it brought us all closer together and I'm grateful to him for that. It goes without saying that this loss cuts us all deeply. I would like to mention a few people. Maureen, Kevin and Jo were involved in Brian's day to day care, and they did a sterling job. With Maureen as the "boss" (as Kevin affectionately calls her), the three of them worked hard to help relieve Brian's pain and suffering. The banter continued, as you can imagine, with Brian very adeptly sending messages with his light-writer! And he could communicate so much of his feelings with just his smile.

My mum, Pam, was also very involved in supporting Brian and working with Maureen in the care of Brian. I'm sure Brian took some refuge in my Mum's strength.

I can't begin to imagine what it's like to lose a father, Narelle. You were a wonderful daughter to him and you were certainly the apple of his eye. May you, Paul, Callum and Jade seek solace in the fact that he's no longer suffering. We will always be here for you, no matter how far we live apart.

To everyone, let us remember Brian today whether he was a family man or friend to you, a boatman, a gardener, a man who appreciated fine wine and classical music, and a lover of sport. He was a complex and private man, full of richness and life. He was a person who thought good of everyone. As your god-daughter and niece, the memory of your warm, broad and loving smile I will hold dear in my heart always.

You had the last word, Brian Steele Kinder. You died on April Fool's Day, and sadly the joke's on us.